One of the advantages of having travelled through so much therapy is that I’ve learned to become familiar with my behaviour and its underlying triggers. These days, the uncharacteristic has a tendency to stick out and become obvious rather quickly. This process has occurred over the past few days.
What I noticed was my behaviour around an apparently harmless friend. To my surprise, I realised I was starting to goad him, as if I wanted to provoke a negative reaction. He’s done nothing to warrant such invasive or controlling attention – actually he seems to be a good guy trying his best in difficult circumstances. The last thing he – or anyone else – needs is to be goaded into additional problems.
Goading is not my usual behaviour pattern because I don’t like it when others do it to me. I have better things to do than create intentional negativity in a world has such an abundance of it already. Besides, to goad someone is to tempt them into something they might otherwise not have chosen, usually to their detriment. My commitment to individual freedom of choice runs very deep because I claim that power for myself, including the need for tolerance and endurance when my own choice conflicts with others. So, to wake and find myself in the process of goading another is way out of character for me and therefore worthy of deeper investigation.
In group therapy, there is a theory – known as Field Theory – which says that whatever is being openly expressed by individuals within a group belongs to the group as a whole rather than just those doing the expressing. In fact, there are times when some folk – usually the most active and emotionally intelligent – ‘act out’ unexpressed feelings that do not belong to them. I know because I’ve done it. Catching this acting-out and returning the emotion to source is a true skill of an experienced group therapist.
Catching my own behaviour in the butterfly net of my awareness has been one of the greatest boons of my life. Being psychic or ‘sensitive’ means that my ‘Self’ is porous; impressions flow into my personal field all the time, so knowing what is likely to be me and what belongs to the Field is enormously valuable. Before I knew how to do this, I thought everything I felt was mine. When external darker energies found their way into my feelings or behaviour, I would feel even more terrible about myself than I did already. The process of emotional self-development has made a huge difference to this problem. These days, I can look at my behaviour and wonder about the source, especially when it slips passed my boundaries and into my unconscious behaviour.
If I know I don’t goad with intent these days, where has this behaviour come from? I can’t find anything within myself to account for my indulgence, nor has my ‘target’ done anything to warrant it. Even if he had, all I need do is unfollow him – I don’t need bother with anything else because we respect each other. We’ve gone down this route once already, so I know how he behaves. We share an aim to be good-enough people working to create improvements in a world gone mad, each in our own way. So if I’m not the source and neither is he, where did this energy come from. It reminded me of the game “Let’s You and Him Fight” (from Eric Berne’s “Games People Play”) where a third party creates a conflict between others. Who would benefit from two friendly-enough people getting into a fight with each other? When I asked that question I found my sights rising above personal and interpersonal to the political and beyond.
There are many people who seem to agree that the leaders and would-be-leaders of our nations are manifesting serious symptoms of what looks like insanity. In fact, we might be forgiven for wondering when the people in white-coats are going to turn up to take them back to the asylum, such is the level of disconnect from the reality of the people they wish to govern. But…
Supposing we consider the possibility that this is quite intentional. They look ignorant. They look stupid and we are supposed to believe this. The ignorant and stupid somehow evade responsibility for the clear undercurrents of malice as government after government actively represses or murders the very people they have been elected to represent. When reasonable and peaceful citizens object, they are subject to direct and violent repression. If this isn’t goading, then I don’t know what is. Yet all this is occurring within sight of eyes and cameras. The quality of goading I was picking up was subtle. I didn’t see it until I caught myself going into action and wondered what the hell I thought I was doing. Our politicians may be insane but they are visible. The goading I was picking up was hidden.
As a former therapist and a practising shaman, subtle energies are my stock-in-trade. Our political systems are using brute force which is crude and this stuff isn’t. It’s coming from sources that have intent, an investment, in severing links between those of like minds and hearts through the use of manufactured friction.
In reading this subtle goading, I look at the words I am using: invasive, controlling, below the radar, sneaky, off-balance, hidden, provocative. I wonder if I might be seeing the hidden hand of the puppeteer and I find myself asking questions like:
- Is this a form of distraction and, if so, what are we being distracted from?
- What is the underlying intent?
- What will the perpetrators gain?
- What else is hidden within this?
- What else am I missing?
I don’t have answers but I do have suspicions. I’m reminded of the warnings my Otherworld asked me to post about blasphemy and May 15. We have already seen one blasphemy with the murder of a sacred White Buffalo calf and his mother, which I interpret as a direct attack on peoples’ hopes for the future. What other sacred hopes are under attack?
As I typed that last sentence something new flitted through my mind and allowed me to catch it. I trust that it links to this subject even if I can’t quite see it myself.
It belongs with the 2012 Evolution movement and it goes something like this. How many of these ‘leaders’ are promising rescue or some form of painless ‘Rapture’ to our Future? If I were looking for a source for the Psy-Ops of Subtle Goading, these might be good places to look, although the ‘how’ still eludes my butterfly net.
Evolution is not a competition. It is a personal journey that no-one but we ourselves can make, we have to actively choose it and we start from where we are in the present. Rescue is not an option because our answers are found through the problem and going through has very painful moments which we learn to value for the lessons they teach us. Therefore, promises of rescue, like the Fulford/Drake/Wilcock scenario, automatically become suspect. The same goes for aliens to the rescue – yes, there are Star People communicating with us now but the best are extremely careful about what they impart due to the ethics of non-interference; we have to make our own decisions. Yet, this field would make a good source for distributing subtle psy-ops power games into communities trying to free themselves from the grip of the #Matrix or #NWO, which brings me back to goading.
Goading is an ego behaviour underpinned by pride and the desire for power over others. We are all capable of it because we all have egos. Nevertheless, supposing we chose – just for this short period of time – to stop indulging ourselves with negative behaviour. Perhaps we might see more clearly who prefers us behaving badly and how they benefit from that. When we stop acting-out, we can begin to see who the real actors are.
These is a very difficult and confusing time – yet it contains enormous potential if we can halt our habitual or reactionary behaviour, even for a moment, in favour of discovering who prefers us that way and why.